A Return to Running…and Goals.
I’ve started running more again. You know, since I signed up for the San Pasqual Valley Half Marathon in February. And it has been painful. Literally. When you don’t run a lot, slogging through a 5-mile run at a 10:38 pace on a Sunday morning hurts.
And then there’s the mental anguish of thinking about how much faster I used to be, you know because when you’re running at 10:38 pace, there’s lots of time for thought. Without knowing that I was starting to run again, my friend Pam sent me this text the day after I signed up for the half:
Ouch! I can’t even run one mile at that pace currently! But, if I’m being honest, looking at past results, is a hurt-so-good kind of feeling. I don’t feel sad. I feel motivated. I remember that my faster running days never came automatically. I trained and I got faster. And I hope to do the same again but this time focused more on trail running.
It feels good to push myself. To reach towards a scary running goal. To be excited enough about the goal to wake up early(ish), prioritize eating, and try to deal stomach issues that have been lingering for years.
This [sort of] return to running is a mirror of what is happening in the rest of my life. I’m getting hungry again. Literally…because you know running increases your appetite to a degree only paralleled by pregnancy (so I’ve heard.) But also figuratively. For the first time in a number of years, I’m hungry for challenges and ready to see what I can do when I commit hard to goals.
It’s not that I’ve done nothing or had no goals over the past few years, it’s just been different, more relaxed, more of an exploratory period. The drive, intensity, and [friendly] competitiveness that is consistent with my eastern European roots (Ukrainian) just hadn’t been there for a while. They seem to be back. And I find myself once again approaching my goals with an “I’ll find a way to figure this out, period, and no one, including myself, is going to get in the way” approach.
Stay tuned.
P.S. Speaking of moving towards goals, this productivity planner helped me focus on getting the important things done and helped me realize how over-packed by daily work schedule was:
Considering buying another one for 2019.
